A Guide to Traditional Vietnamese Wedding Ceremonies for Overseas Couples

If you are marrying into a Vietnamese family, or planning a wedding in Vietnam as a couple from abroad, one of the most beautiful parts of the day will be the traditional Vietnamese wedding ceremony. It is warm, full of colour, and steeped in respect for family and ancestors. This guide walks you through what actually happens, what everyone wears, and what overseas couples and guests should know, all told through real weddings we have photographed in Vietnam.

What is a traditional Vietnamese wedding?

A Vietnamese wedding is really a series of small, meaningful ceremonies between two families rather than a single event. The most important is the le gia tien, an ancestral ceremony held at the family home in front of the ancestral altar. Rooted in Confucian respect for family, it is the moment the two families are formally joined and the couple ask their ancestors for blessing. Many couples then hold a larger reception later, but the traditional ceremony is where the real emotion lives.

The ao dai, the dress of the day

For the traditional ceremony, the couple wear the ao dai, Vietnam's flowing national dress. The bride's is usually a deep red, the colour of luck and happiness, often in silk or brocade and embroidered with phoenixes, dragons or flowers. The groom wears a matching ao dai, frequently in blue or a complementary tone. Both often wear the khan dong, a round headdress. If you are a guest, wearing an ao dai yourself is a lovely gesture, and you can rent one easily in Vietnam.

Le gia tien: the ancestral ceremony, step by step

On the day, the groom's family arrives at the bride's home to ask for her hand, traditionally bearing round red trays of gifts. In front of the ancestral altar, incense and candles are lit, the couple bow to honour the ancestors and the elders, and the parents offer words of blessing. Tea is poured and offered to the elders as a sign of respect and thanks. It is also, quietly, where many couples exchange their rings. Expect laughter, a few happy tears, and a lot of family gathered close.

The gifts and the red envelopes

Those round red trays, carried in by young members of the groom's family, hold symbolic gifts: betel leaves and areca nut, tea and wine, cakes, fruit, and often jewellery for the bride. You will also see red envelopes (li xi) passed to and from elders, carrying money and good wishes. Every colour and object means something, and part of the joy for an overseas partner is learning the story behind each one.

What overseas couples and guests should know

• Colours matter. Guests should avoid black (linked to mourning) and pure white (associated with funerals). Choose a bright, celebratory shade such as green, yellow or blue.
• It is a family affair. The traditional ceremony is intimate and centred on parents, grandparents and close relatives. Follow the family's lead and enjoy being welcomed in.
• Dates are chosen carefully. Many families pick an auspicious date by the lunar calendar, so your wedding day may be set by tradition as much as by preference.
• Cross-cultural weddings are wonderful. We love photographing couples where one partner is meeting a fully Vietnamese ceremony for the first time. It is often the most moving day of all.

Real Vietnamese weddings from our journal

Words help, but pictures tell it best. See a purely Vietnamese ceremony experienced for the first time by an international couple, William and Diep's le gia tien, and the grace and colour of Ngoc and Nguyet's traditional Vietnamese wedding.

If you are planning a wedding in Vietnam, whether a full traditional ceremony, a destination wedding, or a quiet elopement, we would love to help you tell its story honestly and beautifully. Tell us your date and let's begin.